So this Friday I had surgery for kidney stones. Surgery went well. Recovery has been painful as all hell, but it’s getting better. Moral of this post…drink more water.
Seriously, if you think being white gives you some special biological advantage over people of color, then you’re a dumb ass and the rest of us would like it if you never reproduce.
So recently I was chatting with a coworker who gave me a lot to ponder. I involves (as you might guess from my title) tolerance vs. respect. His point was that he dislikes the term tolerance. He said, “Anyone can tolerate another person for a short while in a social setting, being tolerant of someone is as good as lying to them. Instead of tolerating a person’s race, religion, sexual orientation, etc., you should respect them. Respect their differences even if you may not agree with them.”
In this day and age where it seems that the “US vs THEM” message is stuffed down our throats by our politicians, religious institutions, and media, respect is a rare thing. There are a lot of groups that I don’t like or agree with, but I respect the right of most of them to exist (I draw the line at racists, hate groups, and those who want to hurt others). Just because you’re different than me or have different beliefs doesn’t mean we can’t sit down and have an intelligent and thoughtful conversation.
I will not tolerate you, I’ll respect you and I hope that you can do the same.
When will it sink into Trump’s thick skull that he can’t continue to use an unsecured smartphone? When will he quit discussing state matters in full view of the public? When will his staff quit using unsecured email servers run by the RNC?
And this is the guy that made such a big deal about HRC having her own private email server.
So it looks like the house here in San Antonio is going to sell. We’re back on track for a Feb 24th departure to make the trek to Salem, OR. I’ve put in my two weeks notice and Randy and I are packing the house up at a good pace.
My superpower? I’m glad you asked. My superpower is being a total human doormat. Apparently I’m incapable of saying “NO” and meaning it. I might say no, but I rarely have the ability to follow through with it.
Person: I need you to do (insert imposition here) for me.
Me: I can’t right now.
Person: Come on, just this once (this is actually the 30th or 40th time I’ve done this for this person)?
Me: Ok…I guess if I rearrange my (insert life, finances, time, procedures) I could.
That’s my curse, I’m competent and reliable…and a pushover. Family, friends, and coworkers all know they can abuse my good nature and I’m not going to say a thing.
Standing up for myself has never been an easy thing for me to do. At 44 years old I’m realizing that I need to be more willing to say no and actually stick to it. It’s really true that nice guys finish last…because we’re always doing our work and everyone else’s too.
From now on, NO isn’t a word that means maybe in my vocabulary. It means that after careful consideration, I feel that the cost/benefit ratio of the proposal is too far in the cost column on my ledger and I will require a more balanced proposal before I agree.
Winston Churchill said, “If you’re going through hell, keep going.”. What if that place is worse?
Every time I think the worst is behind me, another larger obstacle seems to crop up and impede my path. I constantly feel like a man stuck in the desert chasing mirages.